You know how you just go through life, not really taking a moment to recognize how far you’ve come? A few months ago, I finally acknowledged how many big life changes I’ve experienced over the last few years – and just how HARD it all was. It kind of hit me all at once. I suppose I never recognized it as it was happening, because I was just too busy surviving day-to-day. And well, that was enough at the time
In the words of Glennon Doyle, we can do hard things. I’ve done this before on my personal Instagram account, but I’m going to take some time to do it here too – make a list of all the hard things I’ve done. Because, if I can do hard things and still be standing, so you can you. I’m sure you have, and you are, but have you taken a moment to acknowledge it all?
Let’s start at the beginning – Fall 2015 – when my life started to shift. These are all the HARD things…
- Being shaken to the core by what I perceive as a traumatic experience, with a before me and an after me. And one that still has the ability to rattle me today.
- Being strong for myself – by myself – throughout this experience and all it took for me to come back to myself.
- Allowing the blog I worked hard on for 2 years fall apart because I couldn’t find it in me to keep going on as normal after this experience.
- Watching my life as I knew it crumble before me.
- Leaving my relationship + marriage after more than 13 years.
- Losing everything and crumbling to pieces.
- Being on my own for the first time ever – at 30 years old.
- Not knowing if I could make it on my own financially.
- Going to work smiling and socializing every day and not telling a single person what I was going through.
- Not letting my personal struggles interfere with my tough job.
- Telling everyone I was good, okay, alright when I wasn’t, in the least bit, any of these things.
- Allowing myself to breakdown, cry, fall apart, not be able to breathe, and still not asking for support.
- Doing everything alone, by myself.
- Not having the support of some of my family during this difficult time.
- Being torn to shreds emotionally time and time again.
- Having those closest to me not know how to approach me or what to say to me. Knowing they said nothing to me, but a lot behind my back.
- Dealing with the struggles of others while quietly dealing with my own personal struggles.
- Bottling it all up, until it was all so pressing, I broke.
- Waking up and getting out of bed most days – later, later, and later.
- Not really knowing how to make it through the days, but managing to put one foot in front of the other.
- Sinking into a deep, dark black hole. But still making it through by the grace of God.
- Being told I had to leave my apartment within a short amount of time, leaving me to make some really tough decisions.
- Making the decision to quit my job and move home – after 8+ years at my job and over 10 years living out of state.
- Quitting a job I loved – even though I knew I needed to quit.
- Actually moving home was really, really HARD.
- Moving twice, all by myself.
These are all the hard things I’ve done the last few years. Every.single.one of these things – and probably more – were HARD and challenging.
But, you see, I CAN do hard things. And so can you. I may have lost everything, but I have also gained so much – mainly, myself.
Take some time today to acknowledge the hard things you’ve done and give yourself credit, because YOU DID IT and you’re still standing. Even if you’re going through something tough right now, know you’re going to pull through and you’re going to make it. Choose to love yourself and to allow yourself grace – every single day. This, whatever is happening right now, is making you into a stronger person – the hurt, the pain, the anguish, the tears…they are with reason. Ask yourself what can I learn from this? And when you feel ready to take the lesson and leave the rest, go ahead. There is sunshine after every storm. Keep your head up. If I can offer one piece of advice, it is this – don’t be afraid to ask for help and support. I didn’t, but I know now that I should have.
The past 3 years have been HARD, but also very insightful and transformational for me. Every struggle I went through made me who I am today. And I’m very proud of myself and how far I’ve come. Getting to this point was NOT easy, but with determination, perseverance, and God, ALL things were and are possible. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – my journey is just beginning and the best is yet to come!
I can do hard things.
YOU can do hard things.
WE can do hard things.